Saturday, April 29, 2006

Happy Birthday Nela!!!


We hope you have a wonderful day full of fun and love and that you may get everything you've ever wished for. May God continue to Bless you!!!

Thank you for always being there, through the good and the bad times, and for always making us feel loved and like we were your own children. It means the world to us.

We love you!!!

Went to pick up Jasmine this morning, of course she was not ready to come home. She was having such a wonderful time at Jamie's house.
I don't know why I was so worried, well maybe because it was her first sleepover, but I was thinking I would probably get a phone call to come and pick her up. I'm so proud of her and so glad that she had a good time. I guess now we can count on more sleepovers without any problems.

Spent the day planting tulips, mowing and cleaning out the front yard. It truly feels like I got a lot accomplished and as I stood fixing dinner, I felt this true sense of happiness.

This feeling of being happy and exactly where I want to be, knowing that I'm ok with who I am and what I'm doing in life.

You see I have spent so much time in my life trying to be something I'm not, hiding behind this mask. Trying to be the people pleaser and putting myself last. It's easier to just say yes then to face the idea of someone being upset with you or judging you for what you are doing.
But all it does is make you withdraw deeper into yourself, until you feel that there is nothing left.

A week or so ago, Julie from Everyday Mommy reminded me to reread the book of Joshua and pointed out that if I hadn't noticed before, there are numerous times in which the words BE STRONG AND OF GOOD COURAGE are repeated. What a wonderful reminder to remain strong in the face of adversity, in the face of grief or loss. I know how hard it is to take that step, it's as if we become so comfortable in our own little bubble that any effort to change is just too much to bare.
BUT the minute you actually step outside that comfort zone and go through all the hardships just to be left basking in the glow of the love of the Lord, it's all worth it.

So yes, today I smile, I've been through the ups and the downs, I've been through the feeling of wanting to just give up, it's much easier to isn't it?
I've been through it and I fought through it, I fought through everything that was thrown my way, for with the Lord at my side, ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING is possible.
I can say that I've come through on the other side, I started out as a wobbly toddler, stumbling about and trying to find that firm place to step, and came out this beautiful courageous and thankful woman. What a feeling!!!!!!

1 comment:

Sandra said...

Julie - Thanks again for pointing me towards Joshua.....it's definitely one of the coolest books. I've learnt so much or rather RELEARNT so much after reading it again. Hugs :)